Just imagine going on a night out with these lads.

This might be how it would pan out...

Miguel Angel Jimenez - Bit of style

We’re starting the night in style. A nice bottle of Rioja with some tapas whilst Miguel natters on about the finer things in life... we're in heaven!

Sullivan, Lowry and Wood - Beers with the lads lads lads

Sat around a table chatting football with the lads in rounds. Lowry is sinking his well fast which is annoying Wood who’s up next to get them in. Sullivan just spilt a load on the table over his McCoys Flame Grilled.

Rory - Few Jagerbombs

That little scamp Rory has come over to the table with a tray of Jagerbombs in Yates’ and thinks it’s hilarious. That’s come to £60… just where does he get all that cash?

Darren Clarke - Still standing after 15 pints

Walking to the next pub through town and the Ryder Cup captain is going strong. He’s been sat in the corner with Miguel puffing cigars and has sent away 15 Guinnesses. Impressive stuff!

Open champion Darren Clarke admits he has not slept and reveals a list of the beverages he has consumed since winning the tournament.

Dustin Johnson - The club man

Rory has given Dustin a ring who is hooked up at the club. He says his Mrs and her mates are there which has got a few of the lads excited. Get there and Dustin is absolutely buzzing to see us... God knows why?!

Nicolas Colsaerts - Proper club man

Paulina’s mates were well annoying and weren’t going for any of your drunken lines, shouldn’t have done that second tray of Jagers with Rory.

Colsaerts phones up from some hipster club in a multi-storey car park playing Belgian techno music. You go down and it’s sick. Which coincidentally Chris Wood is being in a biffa bin.

And finally... Robert Allenby - The guy that blacks out

The morning after you realise Allenby went missing after the first pub. Apparently he had his drink spiked before heading to strip club and got beaten up by tramps because he was flashing his credit cards shouting ‘I’m richer than you’. 

Far fetched we know!

I'm the Managing Editor at The Club. I like putting and Rioja. I dislike my low slice.